2 full years. Thats how long I’ve been free from a relationship. A situationship. Whatever you wanna call it.
Wtf HAVE I been doing?
Well, Lots of things. Back in 2022, I was a codependent people pleaser. I needed someone. I couldn’t be alone, let alone DO things alone. It was scary. I needed someone. Well RIP to that girl that yall used to know. She is DEAD AND GONE.
All that effort I was giving to other people, all that love I was trying to give the wrong people, I began pouring into my own cup. Taking myself on dates. Spending quality time with myself. Loving myself in all 5 love languages.
Being alone is so peaceful. It’s pure bliss.
I’ve traveled to the other side of the state, taken myself to meet my favorite comedian, in September I’ll be taking myself to a concert/meet & greet to one of my favorite artists. I take myself out to dinner. Go to coffee shops just to read. I don’t have to worry about responding to someone. You know- you haven’t truly lived until you get yourself a hotel room, have all your favorite snacks and just enjoy your own company.
I started a career, go to the gym and cycling classes. And now the blogs back! I’ve poured so much into myself.
The past few years have been a journey, but I’m so glad I’ve taken the time to love myself. I’ve become comfortable being alone, which means that when the time comes and I do meet someone, I will know that I’m not settling just because I don’t want to be alone like I’ve done SO OFTEN in the past.
So how did I do it? How did I go from being afraid to even run into a store quick by myself to taking solo trips across the state and to shows alone?
I honestly just woke up one day, wanted a new book and decided to go to Barnes and Noble for a new one, got a coffee and read. And while I did that, I thought to myself, “Hmm this is nice, why don’t I do this more often?” I didn’t need someone to come with me. And the rest is history. When I’m hungry and don’t feel like cooking, I take myself to a nice restaurant, get a drink and sit alone. The only thing holding me back from living my best life was ME. I can do anything I want. I have a car, I have money. If I sat around waiting on my friends to do things all the time, I’d never do anything, and life’s too short for that.
So do it. Take yourself out. TREAT YO SELF. learn to love yourself before you give yourself to a person. Learn to enjoy your own company. I was in a relationship for so long before being single that I truly didn’t know how to be my authentic self, due to trying to be such a people pleaser. This time alone I was able to find myself, be myself, and love myself. It was needed, and I’m glad I spent over a year with myself. ♥
